After 13 days of parenthood it seems we finally have the time to share Blairs story. Let me just preface this by saying the reason I haven’t had time is not for the reasons you would think.
Most parents of newborns or parents of any children would tell us the following…
“get ready to never sleep again” or “i don’t miss those days” etc etc etc, and the FIRST question we have been asked CONSTANTLY in many different forms is “how is she sleeping..?”
People are then subsequently floored when we tell them that we have to wake her up every morning and she’s sleeping 6-8 hour stretches every night #thankyouessentialoils #seriously but more on that later!
Anyway if you know me at all you know I love my sleep so the reason I haven’t had time is because Blair and I are sleeping pretty much constantly and when Im awake Dean and I spend our time basically staring at her. I can’t complain though cause HOW COULD YOU NOT STARE AT THIS FACE!
Ugh. Anyway, WE HAD A BABY! I won’t go into too much detail about Blairs birth story because Im sure you don’t want the play by play but I will give you a synopsis.
We went into the hospital Wednesday June 28th at 10pm to start an induction. We were a day and a half from my due date and as the weekend came close Dean was about to go on duty for 3 days and our OBGYN wasn’t on call for those days so we figured it was much safer to induce and make sure I wasn’t having this baby on our couch by myself, especially because Blair seemed like she had no intentions of making an appearance anytime soon.
So while we were waiting on a room at the hospital that evening Dean and I went out to have dinner at one of our favorite restaurants around 8. While we were eating we got a phone call telling us to come in and thats when I started to stress a bit. I had all of this excitement about finding out the gender of this baby and who they were going to be, and some stress about what having a baby was even like. So as we left the restaurant and drove home to get all of our stuff and say goodbye to the pups we were of course joking and wondering what was about to happen. The joking continued as we checked into the hospital and got ready to meet our baby. We got some mixed emotions from the nursing staff as not everyone understands Deans humor. I had cervidil at midnight and an epidural around 6am (all hail the drugs ladies). Once I had my epidural they told me to get some sleep which Dean and I both did. My nurse who was AN ANGEL came in every few hours to move me around and help me progress in an attempt to avoid Pitocin which worked like a charm. Praise God, and great nurses! I woke up from my last nap around 2 and my nurse came in to check my progress and told us it was time to call the doctor because I was 9.5cm and ready to go! Dean basically flew off the couch and into survival mode which now when I think about it is so funny because he was dead asleep 5 minutes before.
Our OBGYN came in and got ready to go and after 10 minutes of pushing we had a baby! I couldn’t see anything so of course I’m waiting for Dean to tell me if it was a girl or a boy and when he told me it was a girl all those months of wondering and questioning were so incredibly worth it, especially hearing it from Dean.
Within moments I watched my husband transform from the goofy, laid back guy I married into a Dad. A man who had never held a baby was rocking my little girl around our hospital room like he had been doing this for years. In those first few moments of Blairs life I was seeing two people I had never met before. I was seeing him in a way you would only understand if you have had a child with someone. Even 13 days later he continues to shock me every day. In 13 days I have been taken care of, catered to, and loved in such a new way. Dean has taken the role of dad as seriously as he has taken the role of husband and for that I am so lucky and so blessed.
A couple days before I went into labor I stumbled upon a verse from Esther.
“Perhaps this is the moment for which you have been created.” -Esther 4:14
See God knew I was feeling unsure. I was feeling weak and full of worry. I don’t usually describe myself or see myself as a particularly strong person and I was struggling with the thought that I wouldn’t be able to handle childbirth. I was letting the enemy fill my head and my heart with lies to diminish who I am and what I am capable of. God could see this and in those days before Blairs birth he sent me this verse and filled me with a fire and confidence I have never felt before. In addition to this what I didn’t know was that God was preparing Dean for this as well. Dean was solid. He was every love language wrapped in one human being. He was words of encouragement during labor, physical touch in the moments right after, acts of service when I was stuck in a hospital bed for 2 days, quality time since he has been home with us, and he gave me the best gift I’ve ever gotten in our daughter Blair.
During the duration of my pregnancy Dean and I heard a lot of things from a lot of people. Things that gave us the impression that people had children and thought their lives were over. Advice that seemed to come in such a negative form. We heard these comments so often and it was so disheartening so I would like to address it from the Burtons point of view. Parenthood is literally the most wonderful thing I have ever experienced. I hardly have words to explain how my heart feels every day that I wake up and realize what my life has become. A life I don’t deserve that God has blessed me with anyway.